Glee! Live!

Some of my thoughts about the show...

It was fun. I had a great time. I had bought my ticket the day of the show, and it was a pretty good seat, on the floor, kind of in the middle. I think it would have been more fun if I had been closer to my friends, since I was a single 30something in a sea of giddy teenagers and CRA-ZA-ZY fans. One of them in front of me had a 2 sided poster - one side was devoted to Finn and one side to Puck. Another fan had a homemade t-shirt with "Monteith" emblazoned on the back. Yeah. I was with those fans (but I was on the floor, what did I expect?).

The show opened with the Legion of Extraordinary Dancers and, yeah. They were all right. It went on kind of long. And since I worked at a dance company with some truly extraordinary dancers, it takes a lot to wow me when it comes to dance. These guys were all right.

The Glee part of the show didn't start until 9:00. When the opening strains of Don't Start Believin' started up, we were on our feet and we stayed there throughout the entire show. The Glee clubbers were all there - represented via video were Will Schuester (since he's off with NKOTBSB) and Coach Sylvester. A few of the Warblers were also there, we all know it's really Blaine and the Pips anyway. And he was there. And I love him. So I was happy (but why the teaser about the big 80s number without giving us Blaine and Rachel singing "Don't You Want Me"??

My favorites - Blaine (Darren Criss) and Kurt (Chris Colfer - his "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" just melts my heart, I just wanted to give him a hug and then dress him up in corduroy and put him on a shelf in my room), Santana (Naya Rivera) with her awesome vocals on "Valerie" and her duet with Mercedes (Amber Riley) which I maintain should have TOTALLY WON the duets contest. Brittany (Heather Morris) is a completely fierce dancer - now her number wowed me! What else? Oh, I love Quinn's (Diana Agron) new hair (I wonder if mine would look cute like that?) and Lea Michele absolutely brought it on "Firework". And yes, I loved the boys singing "Friday" and I was delighted that they let Artie get up out of his wheelchair for Safety Dance. That poor guy is not really in a wheelchair, you know? And he has to sit in one for the whole tour. But he gets to bust a move on one song...

Yeah. That's what I remember about the show. Some of the time, I was thinking 'I can't believe you're sitting here with all these crazies' and the rest of the time, I just joined in and became one of the crazies. If you can't beat em, join em, right?

Oh - and I know the set list is made up of, like, stuff they sing on the show, but I thought it might have been nice to add a little Chicago style variety into the mix. When they were all like, we love you, Chicago! And launched into "New York" it was weird. I love New York (the place AND the song), as you all know, so I was screaming my head off in a fit of fan girl frenzy (see "crazies, became one" note above), but I also think "My kind of town" or "Sweet home Chicago" would have been a nice (personal!) touch.

Still love you, Glee.

xoxoxo (have suddenly morphed into Gossip Girl?)

Glee-cap - Nationals (don't stop believing??)

SPOILER ALERT!! If you haven't seen tonight's Glee, read no further. I will dish and I will divulge. Go watch it and then come back and read, okay?



So, yes. I was looking forward to this episode for two reasons: 1 - Patti LuPone's cameo and 2 - those great big, colorful shots of the gang frolicking at Lincoln Center (although, can I say, when I tried to dance on the fountain at Lincoln Center, I got YELLED AT by a security guard). The episode, much like the rest of the season, seemed to be a little bit all over the map. It seemed like they were trying to cram everything into that one tiny little hour - Will's big Broadway decision. Finn and Rachel's big relationship decision. Nationals. New York City. The rivalry with Vocal Adrenaline. Maybe they should have had a two hour, or two part finale? Or maybe that's the trouble with such a big ensemble with lots of co-existing storylines?

We've got the gang in NYC for Nationals, but there's a little bit of a problem. You know those amazing original songs they're gonna sing? Yeah. Those haven't been written yet. Major essay crisis. The kids are sequestered in their hotel room, tasked with writing these huge show-stoppers (complete with arrangements and choreography) WITHOUT any assistance from Mr. Schu, who has gone off to perform with April Rhoades in a grrrreeat biiiig brrroooaaadwayyyy shoooowwww! And suddenly the show is a Matthew Morrison music video. Not that I'm complaining.


Cut to - New Directions says FTS to hanging out in the hotel room (Brittany's original song "My Cup" wasn't going to cut it, awesome as it was) and goes out to find inspiration on the streets of New York City. Montages ensue. Later, back in the hotel rooms, the boys try to get to work. Finn pines for Rachel. In their room, the girls have a pillow fight.


Finn asks Rachel out on a big, splashy New York City date. They meet The Patti at Sardis. Patti goes all Yoda on Rachel, telling her to never give up on her dreams. And then she leaves. What the what??? Why would you invite this Broadway legend to be on your big huge New York show and NOT HAVE HER SING????? This is my question. I will take whatever she wants to give me, but honestly, Glee. A little bit of a fail there, I think. And no so-called "diva off" either. Patti wins, Lea. Every time.


Anyway, blah blah blah. The romantic NYC date doesn't go exactly as planned. No songs are written. Tick tock tick tock. Kurt wakes Rachel the next day for Breakfast at Tiffany's. Then they break into the Gershwin Theater and sing a duet on the Wicked stage. A sidebar here - when I was on a choir tour back in high school, our chaperone PUT TAPE ON OUR HOTEL ROOM DOORS so that we wouldn't go sneaking around. So, we were in Minnesota, not like there was a lot of happening nightlife we could have gotten to, but still. We were under lock, key, and masking tape (no lie). Mr. Schu's kids are running around, breaking into theaters, and he is none the wiser. But wait!! He decides he loves them and doesn't want to go to Broadway after all. Yeah, I'd choose being a teacher in Ohio over being an actor in New York too (NOT).

There is a brief moment where Quinn is all wonk, wonk, wonk, I just want somebody to LOVE me, sniff, sniff!!! Well, hello, honey, you had Finn once before, but you cheated on him, remember this? Lied to him about being the baby daddy etc. Then you had Sam, who was willing to do that pottery thing with you, and was frontman of the Justin Bieber Experience (duh. Why didn't you guys do THAT for Nationals? Nobody would have beaten the Bieb!) but you ditched him for Finn. Brittany and Santana try and comfort her a little bit (no, not that way!) and then tell her that she will feel SO MUCH BETTER if she gets a haircut. Wait, huh? Then later we see her with new hair. It's cute. But will it make someone love her? I think they missed a moment there, to kind of get to the heart of Quinn's character and make the audience feel like she's not a total manipulative beeyotch. There could have been a cute, girls' day out montage in NYC. Shopping! Hair cutting! Bonding! Making us like Quinn! Still, not enough time, and we've still got songs to write!!!

Eventually, after a big old group hug, they get down to business and crank out those songs. And not a moment too soon, because here we are at Nationals!! The competition seems almost like an afterthought. We see some random girls' choir (insignificant, and a big time waster since we know nothing about them, why do they get airtime??), and then Vocal Adrenaline does their thing. Then it's New Directions' turn. They sing a great original song (written by Finn. Who knew he had it in him, indeed?) but Finn gets overwhelmed by the moment and plants a big old smooch on Rachel. After she has just told him that she loves him, but she loves her future dreams more. Whoops.

It turns out that kiss not only cost them the National championship, our team SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER doesn't even make the top 10. Well, damn. Does this mean we have to do this whole thing again next season?

Kurt retells the whole story to Blaine (what the hell happened to the Warblers, anyway? Didn't they tie at Regionals/Sectionals?) at the coffee shop where they run into (aawww!) Mercedes and Sam. Blaine's on his way to an audition at Six Flags (there's a Six Flags in Ohio?) and Kurt's busy working on a new musical "Pip, Pip Hooray" about Pippa Middleton. That line, a little throwaway, was possibly the best moment of the whole episode (don't tell Patti).

All in all, everyone seems pretty okay with coming in 12th. Because, as Brittany tells us at the end, the competition wasn't even really the point. And what was the point? Acceptance, which is a pretty fair evaluation of the season. Acceptance for Kurt, for Brittana, for Puck and Lauren. Acceptance of Sam's family circumstances. And that no matter what, the New Directions is one big, kind of dysfunctional family. They may steal each other's boyfriends/girlfriends and threaten to quit every week but they love and accept each other.

Until next season.

Glee Update: here comes the dentist...

Gleek Alert! Just read that John Stamos will be cast as Will's rival for Emma's affections - her dentist.

Glee-cap: Journey to Regionals

Remember how last week everybody was in a funk? It got worse with the announcement that Sue Sylvester was going to be on the panel of "celebrity" judges for regionals. See, Will? I TOLD you it was a bad idea to mess with Sue's emotions. Hell hath no fury like the fury of Sue Sylvester scorned. Plus, there was the ultimatum delivered by Principal Figgins, namely, place at Regionals or the club is disbanded. At a meeting to decide their set list for regionals, everybody pretty much sat around crying instead. The situation was so futile even Will cried - in his car, as "Don't Stop Believin'" played on his radio.

But wait!!! That gave him some inspiration. "JOURNEY" he wrote on the blackboard the next day. It's not just the winning that matters, he told the dejected crew, but the journey they have taken to get there. What better way to express that than through (wait for it) the music of Journey?? New Directions' Regionals setlist included "Faithfully" "Anyway you want it/Lovin' Touchin' Squeezin'" and of course, "Don't Stop Believin'". They came, they sang, they conquered. But was it enough??

Quinn went into labor just as Vocal Adrenaline took the stage. Jesse rocked out to "Bohemian Rhapsody" - and Quinn was rushed to the hospital. Yeah, "Bohemian Rhapsody" rocked (Jonathan Groff, I kind of love you now). This is serious competition. There was one other group (called "Oral" something or other. I keep wanting to call them "Oral Fixation" but that's not what it was.) which was kinda odd because it was supposed to be Midwest regionals. Where was Chicago, huh??? Did we or did we not just bring the world the most recent American Idol??

Rachel talked to Shelby and tried to convince her to come co-direct New Directions with Mr. Shue. But alas. Shelby told her she wanted a life, a house, a dog... a family. Jokingly, I said, as Shelby, "I'm going to adopt Quinn's baby!!" And later, she DID. I am pretty sure you can't just walk into the hospital and adopt a baby like in one day, but whatever. She adopted her and named her "Beth" just like Puck wanted. At least she didn't go with Jackie Daniels.

The regionals "celebrity" judges were Sue, the news guy, Josh Groban and Olivia Newton-John. Olivia wanted to vote for Oral whoever, because they did a mashup of Olivia and Josh songs. She disparaged New Directions for their ragtag appearance and lack of production values, only to be defended by... Sue. Cut to the stage for the announcement. Oral whatever was announced as the runner up, leaving New Directions face to face with Vocal Adrenaline (another perfect moment for a West Side Story style dance rumble, yes?)

And, the winner is....

Do you need to ask?? This show follows the Whedon model of not allowing any of our beloved characters to be too happy. So naturally, the winner was Vocal Adrenaline. New Directions did not place at all, and so was disbanded. Emma went to bat for the kids with Figgins. "Some things are worth fighting for," she tells Will, and she is totally not talking about their relationship, either (maybe). Will tells her he loves her (then you shouldn't have been slutting it up, Shue) and "dentist or no, this is not over." The kids call him to the auditorium before this conversation can go any further.

They sing a very heartfelt rendition of "To Sir With Love" and who is that lurking around in the background?? Sue Sylvester, of course! She confronts Will in the choir room, as he is packing his stuff up (which is weird, actually, because he has an office somewhere else, doesn't he?). She tells him she came mainly to gloat, but that really, although she had won, she was not sure she wanted to live in a world where she couldn't make fun of his hair and try and thwart his every movement. Because of that, and because what Olivia Newton-John and the others said back at judging really hit home, Sue convinced Figgins to give the Glee club another year.

Which we really pretty much knew, since the danged show is renewed for two more seasons. Still, hooray! One more year! Will tells the group the news, and broke out his ukelele to sing "Over the Rainbow"in the style of the Hawaiian singer Israel Kamakawiwo'ole. Rachel takes instant charge, telling them they'd better start rehearsing for sectionals, but Will tells them to take the summer off and enjoy themselves.

One more thing though - when Sue was talking to Will, she said during judging, it was easy to make the decision over who should win and it cut to her filling in her ballot. Her choice for #1?

New Directions.

Happy summer, Gleeks!

if Glee had a year book...

Glee-cap of last night's Journey to Regionals to come later, but first, a year book entry homage to Glee, inspired by some of my actual year books:

Dear Glee!!
OMG, I loved sitting next to you in choir this year. I hope we have some classes together next year (with that cute Mr. Shue!) Have a great summer. See you at the pool. Hope you get some guys.
Don't Stop Believin!!!

Have a time, xoxoxo,
Kristen

Glee-cap: Bring in da funk

This week, New Directions found themselves in a funk. First of all, their arch-rivals from Vocal Adrenaline showed up in their auditorium - and the lying, scheming, but at the same time totally cute Jesse St. James was back among their ranks. Uh oh. It's a regionals smackdown, friends, and these guys mean business. They did a great number to psych out our Gleeks, and also TP'd the choir room. In retaliation, Puck and Finn and some of the guys busted the air out the tires of V.A.'s range rovers. Yes, it's true. After they won sectionals, each member of V.A. got their own range rover. As Shelby explained to Will and the delinquents "we've got a big booster group." Can I get a DAMN and also a BAM JIGGY. To pay back the damage, Puck and Finn get jobs working for the ex-Mrs. Shue, Terri (just when we all thought she was off the show, dang it).

The gang is depressed and it does not help when Sue comes in to measure the choir room as a storage space for the Cheerios' anticipated new Nationals trophy. Then, Will gets depressed too. In a funk, which turns out to be the answer to his show-choir based questions. He tells the group that since funk is all about soul and anger, it is beyond the skills of Vocal Adrenaline who are just a bunch of soul-less automatons. Yes. They need a funk number to add to their set list for regionals and the world will make sense again.

They decided to make Quinn pregnant again this week and show off some of her baby mama rage, in a weird-ass rendition of "A Man's World" backed up by a group of fellow pregnant students. Is it me, or are really pregnant people probably not supposed to do funk dancing? Weird, so weird. I don't think that's the way to win regionals, personally.

There's a whole thing where Will flirts with Sue, in a misguided attempt to take her down. Dude. The point is to mess with the person to get her off her game at Nationals, not to flirt with her, tell her you were just being mean and then making her hate you. William - you will never, ever, ever, ever, win at this game with Sue Sylvester. After Will's rejection, Sue took to her bed (in her track suit, of course) clutching one of her Cheerios trophies. Will, feeling bad, goes to visit her. He chats with her maid in espanol, reminding us, once again, that he's a Spanish teacher!! He apologizes and she tells him he would have made a great trophy husband, noting from her decor that "I like me some trophies." And I like me some Sue Sylvester!!! She makes a recovery and leads the Cheerios to Nationals victory. Reporter: you're like the Michael Jordan of cheerleading! Sue: Yes, I am!!! The highlight of their routine? Kurt, sinigng a 14 minute medley of Celine Dion hits - in French.

Jesse shows up again in bastardly fashion, asking Rachel to meet him in the parking lot. She agrees, even though she KNOWS he's been a V.A. SPY with the plan to mess with her mind before the competition. She floats out there, runs up to him in slow motion, etc, only to get egged by members of Vocal Adreneline. He cracks the last egg, on her face. Lovely guy. Glad he doesn't want to see her get hurt and all.

The guys vow to get revenge - Kurt pointing out "Rachel's one of us. We're the only ones who get to humiliate her!" They are on their way to re-arrange Jesse's (hunky but assholic) face when Will stops them. They call up Jesse and tell him to have V.A. meet them back in their auditorium. Well, they end up singing a funk song and rocked it. Personally, I think it would have been cooler for them to have had a West Side Story style rumble, with each team facing off in an epic and fierce singing/dancing number.

Anyway. After watching this funky number, Jesse grumbles to a cohort "They did a funk number. We've never been able to pull off a funk number." Her reply "Because we're soul-less automatons." He sighs, slumps into his seat. "I'm sooo depressed!"

Psych!

Glee-cap "Theatricality"

(image from Glee's facebook page!!)

I don't have a lot of time for a blow-by-blow of last night's episode, which means that you should just go and watch it and then we can talk about it.

But here's what I got:

1. Oh, Rachel. You would have been better off with Patti as your mom... I don't understand why they even threw that in there (except Idina and Lea look like they could totally be related?) - first, I don't think the audience knew enough about Rachel's sadness over her mom, so when the introduced it, it was like, oh, okay. Well, that's good, she found her mom. But then Shelby was all like I want to meet my daughter, but then she was not really ready to have a teenager, so she set the whole thing up for Rachel to hear the tape and find her and then she just decided that she didn't want to be in her life after all. That's so mean!!!! Shelby told Will that Rachel didn't need her anymore, well, actually, she DOES. Now things are back to the way they were before, so what did this whole "Rachel, I am Your Mother" thing accomplish in the first place?? Oh, except it gave them a chance to sing a funky slowed down "Poker Face" together. Which is a weird mother-daughter duet song but whatever. It sounded cool.

2. Statement that made me super depressed and old - Shelby asked Rachel how her two dads came up with her name, and she said "They were big Friends fans." That means she was born in the 90s sometime, when I was in high school, watching Friends. That means there is a generation of people who won't get Friends references, Ross and Rachel! How YOU doin'?? all of that. It is like an old time tv show to them. I needed to go and lie down for a while after that.

3. The Lady Gaga inspired outfits and "Bad Romance" number were AWESOME. I especially loved Quinn's pink outfit (although she looked completely un-pregnant again), and Kurt's crazy lobster shoes. He could have just kicked those asshat jocks with one of those suckers. He would probably have fallen down, but I bet a kick to the junk with those shoes would have hurt.

4. Loved Kurt's dad standing up for Kurt when Finn was being a bonehead. I mean, look dude, I know you are all of a sudden being made to live somewhere without even getting to voice an opinion in the matter, but that's no reason to be a jerk to Kurt.

5. Finn did redeem himself in the end though, when he showed out all Gaga-fied in a skin tight red dress and spangly red eyes (you must know the outfit I mean...) and threatened to beat those football players up for taunting Kurt. Why do those football players look so OLD anyway??? All the players at my high school were like scrawny guys. They didn't look like Bears linebackers.

6. I also loved how Principal Figgins made an example of Tina dressing like a goth and referencing Twilight (which her mom wouldn't let her watch because "she thinks Kristen Stewart looks like a bitch") when she wasn't even INVOLVED in the incident Figgins brought up with kids dressing up like vampires and attacking the nerd boy. And yet, he had no problems with the Gaga-wear OR with the Kiss style pyrotechnics in the auditorium.

7. Every so often they remember that Will is a teacher, and this week showed him in his office - not grading papers or doing lesson plans, but doing internet research on Lady Gaga. They also had him using a Spanish word (I don't remember what it was) as if they were like "Oh, yeah! He's a Spanish teacher! Let's have him say muy bien!"

8. Bad ass Puck wanted to call Quinn's baby "Jackie Daniels" but eventually had an epiphany and asked Quinn if they could call her "Beth" instead, and if he could be present at the birth. She said yes.

Glee-cap "Dream On"

If last week's episode was about finding one's mojo and being true to yourself, this week's episode was about dreams. This week was exiting for the guest appearance of Neil Patrick Harris and the fact that it was directed by Joss Whedon.

Enter Will's nemesis, Bryan Ryan (NPH!! NPH!!) who, will tells us in voice over made his life a living hell in high school, getting all the girls and worse, all the glee club solos. Now he's back, as a macho school board asshat with an anti-Glee Club streak. After a career singing on cruise ships and lounges, he now sells used Hummers (Stop making that face, he tells Will, "Global warming is a myth") and has since found "Jesus" - no, not Him. A central/south American therapist. He also now hosts a Glee Club support group. Glee Club kills, he tells a motley assortment of Glee Club has beens (including Molly Shannon - I am not sure how I feel about her addition to the cast...). His mission now is to make an audit of all of the school's extracurricular activities with a view of making some budget cuts. He tells Will that he wants to speak to the students. Will says no, but he has no choice. It's high school all over again.

Bryan Ryan speaks to the Glee kids, telling them to write their dreams on a sheet of paper. He brutally rips Artie's page from his notebook and tells all the kids that their dreams will never come true. They will spend the rest of their lives in Ohio (YIKES) and never amount to anything. Will throws old Peppy McPep Talk out of the room after all of the students look troubled and Tina starts to cry.

Rachel's dream? Being a star of course. But Bryan Ryan has shaken her confidence. She takes to the dance studio. Jesse comes back (hooray!) from his spring break (with another school. I don't get it either.) They make up and he tells her that she has nothing to worry about - her playing Evita on Broadway? An inevitability. Still, there's something missing - her mom. Jesse encourages her to try and find out her mom's identity. After some research, Rachel has her answer. Her mom, naturally, is Broadway star Patti LuPone. The year of her birth was a big year for "mother", Rachel tells Jesse, as she has just finished starring in Pal Joey. BUT - she also made a tour with Mandy Patinkin to Ohio just after that (and there is the fly in your ointment, Rachel - as everyone knows that the two of them had not toured together after Evita until just recently. Because yes, that's the only problem with this scenario) and this is when it all happened. Jesse looks bemused "Wow," he said. "Did Mandy Patinkin have anything to do with it?" Rachel knows this is a dumb idea but it does not stop her from offering to present research on why Bernadette Peters is her mom.

But ACTUALLY - Idina Menzel is her mom!!! Okay fine, her character, Shelby Corcoran, coach of "Vocal Adrenaline" is her mom. And Jesse knows it! While helping Rachel with some "CSI" style research into her past, he "finds" a cassette (in his pocket) that says "From Mother to Daughter" Rachel freaks out. "What if she sings on the tape?" she asks Jesse. "What if she's terrible?" Then a worse thought "What if she's better than me??" She's not ready to know. Jesse meets with Idina/Shelby in her car and promises that he will have Rachel listen to the tape. Here's my question - what if Rachel hadn't brought up her mom? How would Jesse have worked that in otherwise?

Artie's dream? Is to be able to get up out of his wheelchair and dance. And in one, brief and beautiful dream sequence, he gets up out of his chair and starts to dance to "Safety Dance" in the middle of the mall - it becomes a bit of a flash mob scene, with everyone joining in to his dance (I gotta tell Pierre!!). But this is a dream that won't come true for him.

Back to Will and Bryan Ryan - Will takes Bryan out for a beer "for old time's sake" which is weird because they didn't like each other. Bryan tells Will he's been living a lie! He misses singing, and he goes secretly to New York to see shows. He's got a box of Playbills in the basement he tells Will "like porn!" Will goes to the jukebox and cues up "Piano Man" - they both sing. It turns out Bryan's secret dream is to return to the stage. Will convinces Bryan to audition for the community theater production of "Les Mis" - they both show up to audition for Jean Valjean. Will says he's going to sing "The Impossible Dream" Bryan says he is, too. Will says actually, he's going to sing "Dream On" and Bryan says, oh, that's right, he is too. The director tells them to sing it as a duet (he also runs the dry cleaner and can only leave for 30 minutes at a time). They sing "Dream On"

Bryan has a change of heart, slashes the Cheerios budget (and has a tryst with Sue in her secret upstairs room) and buys the Glee club new stuff (denim jackets! dancewear! sheet music!) But Sue comes down to congratulate Will on his new role as Jean Valjean. Bryan also gets a part - a townsperson with one line "Hooray!" Bryan is furious, declares he's cutting the Glee Club and stomps out, taking all of his bedazzled denim with him.

Will needs to act. He makes an impassioned plea to Bryan about the importance of the arts to these kids. "They may not be stars," he tells them "But they shine like stars." They get labeled when the walk in the door as freshmen, but Glee allows them to be who they are. By cutting the club, Will says, Bryan is dimming their stars and creating 13 black holes. Bryan is not moved. Will offers to give his Jean Valjean role to Bryan (which frees up his schedule for, I don't know - teaching?). "You give me the role and I save the club?" Bryan sneers. Will says yes. Bryan cheers up and agrees. The club lives to sing another day. Dreams really can come true.

Rachel finally listens to the tape from her mother, which promises to "explain everything" but is really just her singing "I dreamed a dream" (note the Les Mis and tie to Rachel's almost mother, Patti LuPone, the original Fantine) which was pretty but explains nothing. Because Fantine DIES, right? How does that offer Rachel any clues??

Next week - the club goes Gaga - Lady Gaga, of course! The teaser promises extreme Gaga style wardrobe and music, and also Rachel putting something together and approaching Shelby and saying "I'm your daughter!" Maybe she's psychic??

Glee-cap

This episode was all about regaining lost mojo. First there's Puck, who had to shave his mohawk (although, seriously, he did not look that different than before?) and was suddenly in dweebland, getting tossed in a dumpster. As he told Santana, he felt like that guy who lost his mojo after getting his hair cut (no, not Samson - Agassi). To increase his cool points, he decides he needs to date someone popular and sets his sights on Mercedes, now a Cheerio and hugely popular. The fact that they have nothing in common does not bother Puck at all. After a few attempts at getting rid of him, Mercedes is finally woo-ed after singing a duet with him to "The Lady is a Tramp"

The Glee club has also lost its mojo - poor Rachel is popping vitamins constantly in her efforts to keep carrying the group with her awesomeness and solos. It's not working. She bugs the choir room (with the help of the AV Club - no way Glee is dorkier than the AV club??) and creates a "Glist" of her own - her fellow Glee-clubbers who aren't carrying their weight. It is half of the group. Mr. Shue gives them an assignment - to find a song that captures who they are today, their story, their voice. Rachel goes first - her song is "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus because it is all about overcoming obstacles. Rachel's obstacle? The rest of the club. She starts to sing but it's all coming out wrong. Oh no! She has... a sore throat.

Finn goes to the doctor with her. Her fear? Being told that she will never sing again. Which the doctor tells her. No, wait, he's just kidding (and sorta mean). She can take antibiotics but really really needs to have her tonsils out. She does not want the operation because who is she without her voice?? Mope, mope, mope, mope. Finn is still pining away for her even though she is "Jesse's girl" Jesse is conveniently away somewhere and Finn sings that song as his Glee assignment (I was wondering what took them so long to toss that song in there). Finn eventually takes her to meet a friend of his - a football player who lost his mojo - and his mobility - in a football accident.

Poor Kurt is so confused this week - his dad is lavishing baseball tickets (or is it basketball?) and hogies on Finn, doing some father-son bonding that makes Kurt feel left out. He gets a pep talk (of sorts) from Coach Sylvester. She tells him only one person can put a label on him "Me?" he says smiling. "No" Sue replies. "ME. Sue Sylvester." She tells him he's not gay just because he likes showtunes "that just means you're awful." and then she checks out of the conversation and vows not to spend time talking to students. He takes matters into his own hands and decides to sing some Mellencamp and don some plaid to get closer to his dad. He even makes out with Brittany (thus completing her perfect record of making out with every guy in school). But all his efforts come to naught - and he busts out with Rose's Turn which was completely awesome. Gosh that guy can sing.

Mercedes and Santana duel it out over Puck coming to vocal and physical blows in a duet of "The Boy is Mine". But Mercedes sees Puck back in his dumpster tossing glory and decides that she doesn't want to be with that kind of guy. She even quits Cheerios, making Sue wonder what she's going to do with the Mariah Carey number that Mercedes would have been singing (damn, that would have rocked). She decides she will probably take to the mic herself with a diatribe "probably about immigration."

Rachel gets better! And visits the paralyzed football player, offering to give him singing lessons. They sing "One" (best.song.ever) which leads into a whole ensemble number of the song, with everyone decked out in denim on denim (still not okay! ever!) Quinn mysteriously does not look very pregnant in these group numbers. What's happening there??

Mojo is restored to all. The world makes sense again.

the power of madonna

Glee's All Madonna episode is on tonight and once again, the nerd choir girl in my soul is doing backflips! I mean, come on, it's Madonna, she who provided the soundtrack to my 80s childhood. I used to have all of her albums - on cassette. In fact, I think True Blue was the first cassette I actually bought. Who can resist the awesomeness of old school Madonna, like "Borderline" and "Live to Tell" and "Holiday" and "Material Girl" and "Lucky Star"??? And Glee? Is just awesome. Put them both together and you get a veritable explosion of awesomeness. I would listen to Lea Michele and Matthew Morrison singing the alphabet. And when you throw in Jane Lynch Vogue-ing? It's magic, people.

I think I stopped digging Madonna after Evita (when she started taking voice lessons and living in England and making crappy movies). I love Evita (for obvious reasons, which you would know if you've been following me for any period of time. I even used to play out the balcony scene on my front porch when I was a kid) and I saw the movie a few times (for a while there, I would sing along with Che but with an Antonio Banderas inflection) but yeah. It's not very good, is it? It's pretty, and she looks good, but Madonna and Antonio lack the power, the fierce intensity, the just plain scariness of the original broadway cast (I still can't listen to that cast album all the way through in one sitting. They are both just terrifying on it.) and missing that intensity is rather missing the point, yes?

Sidebar here - I have a very vivid memory of talking about the movie in Spanish class and getting into it with a classmate of mine, because she claimed that Eva Peron was half Croatian. And I would have gone along with that, like oh, okay, little known fact, etc - except then she told me that Eva says so in "Rainbow High." Uh, what? First of all, don't question me about the book, chica. I mean, I know they changed a bunch of things for the movie ("She's our new world Madonna with the golden touch..." in "Rainbow Tour", being one of those changes.) Second of all, no. Just...no.

And then the music started getting weird (Don't Cry for Me Argentina dance remix, anyone?), and I stopped being a big fan of Madonna's. But this Glee episode excites me a whole lot. Nostalgia, I guess, for the days of Park View (and who thought I would ever say that?), crimped hair, neon pink everything, bangle bracelets, big bangs, fingerless gloves, layered socks and all of that fun 80s stuff.

Whee!! Can't wait for tonight to get my Glee on!!