Have I stumbled accidentally into bizzaro world (or possibly bizarro world)? I'm out sick for one day and all hell suddenly breaks loose - Kris wins Idol (more on this in a second), someone drives into Petterino's (yeah, that's a terrace, you idiot, not a drive thru window...) Did I sleep through the apocalypse yesterday or what?
So yes - the biggest Idol ever - and I was asleep for it. I literally slept all day yesterday, with small breaks to eat, steam my ever clogged sinuses, and feed howling cats. This stupid Idol finale was two whopping hours long - and then, Ryan Seacrest smugly informed us on Tuesday - it was set to run long. What on earth could they possibly do in 2 hours? It takes only 5 seconds to go "Adam, you're the next American Idol" (for instance). And now I'll never know what they did (although rumor has it Kara disrobed and dueted in a bikini with Bikini Girl) and KRIS ALLEN won the "crown." In all honesty, I'm not that crushed over it - I actually kinda like Kris. Tuesday night, I think he did the best - he probably figured he had nothing to lose. He sang "Ain't No Sunshine" which was the week that I sat up and went "Hey, I like this guy!" Because prior to that, he'd always been one of the "mystery dudes" I was forever confusing him and Matt. Then the distinction became clear - he can sing, Matt cannot. I think Kris also did the best with the really craptacular "winner's song" penned by Kara and some other people. His vibe is sort of chill, singer songwriter, the kind of guy we'd go and hear at HOB or maybe even on the Rock Boat. And you know I love those guys, so maybe it's all for the best. And I guess the lesson here is never underestimate the power of the Southern Vote (in life, as in American Idol. Those red states are just killer.) Or the vote of Danny Gokey's right-wing christian fans, who were apparently urged to shift their support to Kris by Danny's pastor. Or maybe the nation's just not ready for guyliner. I was just surprised, that's all, when I woke up this morning, nursing a Nyquil hangover and sleepily asking my mom "Did Adam win?" "Kris won" she told me and I was all like "What?" but good for him and all that. I am sure Adam will be just fine, and you know some of the best stuff happens to those Idols who don't win - observe Daughtry, Kellie Pickler (seriously - if that chick can get a record deal, so can our Adam!) and Constantine Maroulis and his awesome hair who are both now nominated for a Tony. And don't forget J-Hud who won an Oscar.
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